If only...

Oh how I wish I could sew! I probably can, I just haven't tried in years. Make that several decades. But there is a very good reason!

I have a sewing machine. It's my Mom's Singer that she had when we were kids. Most likely after a good tune up it would be fine. I've thought about using it with scrapbooking, as I love the 'sewing' look in scrapbooking.

Even more, I would love to sew little stuff for around the house and for the kids. I recently discovered MADE, which is so much fun. Seeing some of the ideas really makes me think more and more about sewing. I probably would be pretty good at it now - I like to think I'm fairly crafty and creative. I, for the most part, can read and follow directions (as in a pattern). I think I could really have some fun sewing!

If it weren't for the darn flashbacks, I would dig out that sewing machine tonight.

Yes, flashbacks. I think (yes, self-diagnosing here) I have PTSD in relation to sewing. :)

Some background...

My Mom is an excellent seamstress. She can sew nearly anything. She made some very sporty outfits for me and my brothers back in the day. I can still see my first grade pic - patchwork outfit with Holly Hobby on it with my little denim bag with flowers on it that she also made. Yes, I know, blog readers, that you are jealous now. Seriously, it was pretty cute for the 1970's. She made some great work out of polyester too (admit it, Mom!). And let's not forget the cowboy shirts she made for our family of four (Chris missed out on this since he wasn't born yet...well, I wouldn't exactly say that he 'missed' the experience) complete with embroidery and snaps that she put on. Yes, (and I AM saying this in all seriousness, Mom!) she was amazing! Fast forward a few years and she made two of my Prom dresses. There was a design flaw in the one (not her fault) and I had a slight wardrobe malfunction during Grand March of my Senior prom. Oh well, I don't think I flashed too many people! She also made all of Carson's Classic Winnie the Pooh crib bedding. Very special! Anyway, my Mom is amazing with sewing and I know she'd do it more often if she could - she has a great sewing machine and serger.

My Mom probably thought 'like Mother, like daughter' so tried to get me into the excitement through my 4-H projects. I tried. I really did. I made a sassy looking felt tic-tac-toe pillow. A tote bag out of a towel with a drawstring top that I used for carting my swim gear around. There were probably a few other painful little projects along the way.

Then we moved on to clothing.

That I was supposed to wear.

Looking back, I'm not sure who the whole process was more painful for - neither one of us had fun. I truly think I spent more time with a seam ripper than actually sewing. I remember sewing an armhole shut or something of that magnitude on a strawberry dress that I was working on. That was it. I was done. I think my Mom finished the dress. If I did, I have clearly mentally blocked out the experience.

I think most likely I was so slow because I wanted it to be just right. But something just didn't come together with the whole sewing thing and me way back then. I'm not going to spend any time trying to figure out what the problem was. Who knows?!?!?

And it's those flashbacks that keep me from sitting down with the old Singer and cranking out something fun. :)

I wasn't a colossal failure in 4-H. I took some good pics. Made some great cookies. Had some pretty good speeches and demonstrations. I was one of the top cattle judges in Williams County (I didn't do nearly as well at crop judging-that was NOT easy!). I could show my steers and heifers - my brother (Corey) and I did pretty well at county and state levels with our critters. One summer I even hired out and showed a heifer and a bull at the State Fair. I didn't do as much 4-H with my horse, Zip - I loved to barrel race her though. She was so much fun! At least I didn't put all of my hopes and dreams into sewing! :)

For now, the sewing machine is still gathering dust in our basement. Perhaps some day I'll dig it out. But for now, I just keep dusting it every now and then.