One year ago

By date it is one year ago tomorrow that we learned that we had been chosen to be Grace's parents...that she would be our daughter. Travis was in Winnipeg - Nana was recovering from her major surgery. I got 'the call' just before my Mom, Carson and I headed out to the Street Fair (a large arts and crafts event in downtown Fargo). As Grace's social worker shared the news I was numb. It was really happening. This amazing little girl we had learned about a month before was really going to be our daughter. Carson was going to be a big brother. Our family would be complete.

Trav had called just shortly before the social worker, so he was on our home phone the whole time I was on my cell phone talking to the social worker. So he got to hear the reaction and knew right away too. After the conversation with the social worker, Trav and I tried to process what was happening. I remember I was shaking.

It was with so much joy to call each of my parents and tell them the news. Then I called my brothers. Trav was with Nana, Papa and Uncle Ian, so they knew right away too. I'm sure Uncle Derwin found out quickly. The very hardest part was waiting to tell Carson. We wanted Trav to be home, so we waited until Sunday to tell him. It was next to impossible for me to keep the info from Carson, but I managed!

After a quick call to our social worker, Carson and I went to pick up Grammy for the street fair. Grace's social worker had shared that Papa Ron and Nana Jane would be calling some time that evening. Again, it was hard to believe this was really happening,

As we wandered through the street fair, my head was swimming. I started to make a mental list of all that we needed to do and buy. Most people have 9 months to prepare for an addition to the family - I knew we had less than a month! Then I realized that the 'world of girls' is indeed a while new world. Don't get me wrong...of course I love Carson to the moon and back. Girls stuff has a lot more variety and is just adorable. My first purchase was a pink shirt with a princess on it with the caption "I found my Prince...his name is Daddy". I also bought a picture frame for her room (although I didn't yet know how we would decorate it). I think I bought a few other things, but to be honest parts of the street fair are a blur.

Then my phone rang.

It was Nana Jane.

Before I could say much of anything (which is quite rare for me!) I heard the words "you two are the answer to our prayers". Tears flowed. I was sobbing. I found a curb and managed to sit down. Soon I heard a description of what Grace looked like. I knew she was beautiful and a little angel. As I sobbed, Carson sat next to me and patted and rubbed my back. When I signed to him that these were happy tears, he relaxed.

Nana Jane, Papa Ron and Grace were on their way to Duluth for the weekend. We talked several times that evening and throughout the weekend. It was priceless learning more about Grace and her adorable personality. We couldn't wait to see pics and of course, meet her!

The following morning, Carson stayed with Grammy while I did some shopping. I found 'big brother' and 'little sister' shirts for the kids and picked up a few other odds and ends. Where to start - our house was full of boy clothes, tractors, cars and trucks. At least we still had the crib.

Later in the day, Carson, Grammy and I headed to Perham for the Make-A-Wish motorcycle ride. A group had chosen Carson's wish and we wanted to be a part of it. It was a fun and memorable evening. Most of all, I knew that Trav would be home the next day and we could tell Carson that he'd be a big brother.

Fast forward to today. In some ways a year ago feels like it was forever ago and in other ways it feels like just a few months ago. Regardless, we are so complete, so whole, so at peace as a family. When Nana Jane called earlier today she reflected the same thing (as they were prepping to go to Duluth - just like a year ago). :-)

This afternoon Mom and I took in the street fair. Found another cute shirt for Grace that will apply to Nana, Grammy and Nana Jane's houses: "Grandma's house is like VEGAS...What happens there STAYS THERE!". Couldn't resist. I also bought two little gemstones for a necklace with the kids' birthstones. I can't wait to wear it. April (diamond) and March (aquamarine) go very well together!

As we walked through the booths, I knew we were coming close to my 'curb' spot. Sure enough, I found it. Mom thought we should look for the tear stains on the concrete.

We simply can't imagine Carson and Grace not being siblings. We can't imagine Grace not being our daughter. We are so thankful for the love Papa Ron and Nana Jane poured into Grace her first 17 months of life (and how they are now family to us, a big part of our lives and continue to love Grace to pieces).

Tomorrow will be special - we have a lot going on, but it'll be great. Rummage sale first thing in the morning. We're off to a Cully's Kids event in early afternoon. Hopefully a bit of a nap for Grace and then we're heading to Perham to watch the bikers come in and say thank you to this amazing group of fundraisers for what they do for Make-A-Wish.

Most likely we'll be heading to Perham tomorrow at 4:33 pm. That's what time we found out about Grace on July 18, 2008. So, we'll pull over and have a family hug. The kids will think we're nuts. But that's okay. :-)

Here are a few links that bring us back to a year ago:

Sharing the news

Grace's name announcement

Reflections

Carson's thoughts on adoption

Pics are coming - I have nearly 2,000 that are uploading!!!